Molly Squidpiddge

Today, the class was once again on the open plains, under that eerie green sky. In the distance, a multi-vortex tornado was raging.

"Behold," Thor told his students, "the dead man walking. It is said that the Native American tribes of the plains held the wisdom that if you saw it, you were about to die, which is not inaccurate, especially in an era before modern forecasting and storm shelters. Do not fear, we are quite safe. This is a simulation, and even if it were not, I am a god of storms. What you are actually looking at is a multi-vortex tornado, a rare form of tornado that only happens with the strongest of storms, as a phase they go through before reaching their greatest strength. The best-known incidence of a dead man walking was the tornado that hit Jarrell, Texas on May 27, 1997--an F5, the strongest on the modern Fujita scale for measuring tornadic strength. An image was taken in which two vortices resemble legs, while a third resembles the scythe commonly seen in imagery of Death, though the phenomenon has been observed on many other occasions.

"What can you do if you see the dead man walking, or, more practically, if you have become aware through an alert or news broadcast that a tornado is headed for your location? You can seek shelter in a basement or the lowest floor of the building, in an interior room with no windows. If you are in a manufactured building, such as a mobile home, it is unsafe. Seek shelter elsewhere. If you are traveling in a vehicle, and have no other options, get out of the vehicle and lay down in a ditch. It is better than nothing. And then you wait, and you pray." After a moment for that to sink in, he asked, "Are there any questions?"

When any questions had been dealt with, Thor decreed that, "Class is dismissed. Enjoy your vacation. And remember to wear sunscreen!"